At My Old School, the Gods Never Talked to Us...

Over the course of a week, I have learned the true inside scoop on several mythical accounts.  The deities themselves rained down in the tens to come and educate my class on their fantastical legends.  Now, short saplings of their tall, tall tales.

SUN WU KONG-

Sun Wu Kong was born from a rock and spent his early millenniums staring off into space.

RA-

When the humans on Earth didn't give him any r-e-s-p-e-c-t he sent Hathor to punish them with death!  Fortunately he changed his mind.

SET-

Set shoved Osiris into a chest and then drowned him in a river so that he could be the sole ruler of Egypt.

ISIS-

Isis used the poisonous bite of a snake to convince Ra to give her his all powerful secret name.

HORUS-

Horus started a contest with Set to decide who should be the king of Egypt and then he won by cheating in the raft building game.

OSIRIS-

Osiris's brother chopped him into fourteen pieces and scattered them throughout the world, but Isis found them and brought Osiris back long enough to conceive a child.

ODIN-

According to Odin's immense wisdom, the end of the world, Ragnarok, will be signaled by a giant red rooster falling from the sky.

LOKI-

Loki turned himself into a mare in order to seduce a stallion to prevent a giant from finishing his construction in time.  Then Loki gave birth to an eight legged horse.

BALDER-

Balder's seeming invincibility and impervious good looks caused him to die from a mistletoe plant that indirectly came from Loki.

FREYA-

When Freya cried over her missing husband, her tears became veins of gold and pieces of amber.

THOR-

Thor once had to dress up as a bride to the King of the Frost Giants in order to steal back his hammer.

COYOTE-

When Coyote's son died he tried to get Raven to make all of the animals immortal. But Raven wouldn't so they ended up fighting for all eternity.

RAVEN-

Raven impregnated a a rich man's wife by hiding in her water and then was born as her son.  He then convinced the rich man to give him the stars, moon, and sun.

HERMES-

Hermes stole Apollo's cattle and then turned all of the bovines' hooves backwards!

ARTEMIS-

Artemis turned Actaeon into a deer for watching her bath and then she laughed when his hunting dogs killed him.

APOLLO-

Apollo fought the giant snake Pytho to reach his oracles on the island of Delphi.

How I Reached The Heavens

It was an unusually dark day for the Kingdom of Pure Felicity of Lofty Heavenly Majestic Lights and Ornaments, or at least it was until I arrived.  For when my mother, the Empress of Precious Moonlight, gave birth to me, light rushed through the village, flooding the streets with radiant beams.  It seemed that on that day I, Yu Huang, the brand new baby prince, was destined for stardom!

My home where I grew up was in the northern province of China, surrounded by cliffs and hills. Quiet and quaint, my town was the pentipetal of the ancient Middle Kingdom.  When I was young I was educated in the Taoist ways and grew to respect the rituals of our sacred religion.  Taoism taught me the importance of natural harmony, and even more special, the gift of compassion.  Even when I was young, I had heard the tales of how the wise Taoist sages could live incredibly long lives just by meditating and following the Tao.  Of course I knew of the great Lao Tzu, the father of my faith, a man who had reached godliness by following the sacred traditions.  He became my inspiration and on that day I vowed to serve the Tao and its children til I had reached immortality as well.

Finding ways to service others was as simple as pie.  I transformed myself into the epitome of the perfect child, always respecting others, helping the poor, and aiding the ill.  Working myself into a good person came easily and as I grew up I continued to better the lives of my fellow people with my time and talent. To find the Tao and achieve my goals, I would need to be purified.  Compassion, generosity, and mercy altogether are necessary to clean out your soul.  After I had worked out all of the negative energy inside of myself, I was holy enough to go for ascension.

When I was ready to realize the true mystery of the Tao I had to leave behind my town.  I set out to find the way and I ended up at the Bright and Fragrant Cliffs.  The soaring heights, cool air, and most all silence were perfect for my mission.  Then I sat down and began to contemplate the Tao: a mystical force that controls the fate of every organism and every force in the universe.  The power behind the harmony of nature that governs the world.  But what is the Tao?  How does it work?  Where did it come from?  Only by finding the answers to the questions about the Tao can a person gain the mental capacity to extend their very lives.

Eventually I managed to reach the Tao.  A state of calmness and serenity that cannot be described rushed through my being.  Just as I fill my hometown with light, I was flooded by the truth and holiness of the Tao. I became an immortal, but I wasn't done yet.  A million more years were necessary to increase my mental powers. Yeah, it was tedious, but when you're passionate about something, you are willing to give it our all. Even though I had attained supreme strength, I still hadn't become a God.

Opportunity came for me in the form of a grotesque, powerful demon.  Even the Gods were unable to stop the beast!  When all was lost and China was facing impending doom, I, just some random immortal citizen, volunteered as tribute.  I confronted the demon, but not with my fists and sword, rather we would have a duel of the minds.  I was confident that the power of the Tao would protect me, and I knew that I could kill him with my brain.

The tension was mounting; I massaged my temples to try and increase the blood flow to my cerebellum. Even so, I was struggling to keep the monster from overpowering my mind. Finally, much later, I received neurological brain spark and broke the protection dikes of the demon's mind.  As my lie force invaded his, the devil's spirit was flushed out and he was destroyed.

 The Gods were so pleased that they appointed me as the Jade Emperor, head of all deities! I got control of all the heavens, hell and earth.  The best perk though was the comfy chair.   Thus you can see how through a life of piety and focus I went from a commoner you  to an almighty ruler, just like Kate Middleton.  Now the I, Jade Emperor will help you reach your goals of world control too!

The Resolution of the Conflict

Just like the rest of Yu Huang's life, his battle with the demon is long an difficult.  He is facing an impending foe, but he is still fully confident in his powers.  After a long time of strenuous mental meditation, the conflict ends with Yu Huang conquering the monster.  When Yu is proclaimed as victorious, the Gods elect him as ruler over all the heavens.  Yu is given the new title of Jade Emperor and everything ends happily, well not for the demon... But the rest of China was finally at peace, and the just new ruler, the Jade Emperor, is brought to his high heavenly throne.

The Climax of the Conflict

In the myth of the Jade Emperor, the dark and evil demon rears his ugly head.  When it seems that the Gods' great powers are futile against him and all of China is doomed, the immortal Yu Huang comes the save the day.  The climax is when Yu confronts the demon and the battle turn into a crazy frenzy!  Well, actually they fought with their minds...  So there wasn't any Kung Fu, but it was still really intense!  This is the deciding moment; can Yu Huang conquer the demon inside and use the power of the Tao to defeat the beast????

The Conflict

In the myth of the Jade Emperor, the conflict is when the evil demon upsets the peaceful land and defeats the Gods.  He is an unstoppable force that could bring the destruction of China!  Not even the Gods had a chance against this powerful satanic being.  But, perhaps Yu Huang just might have what it takes to put an end to the monster's reign of terror.

Character Development

While the only characters who have a pertinent role in the Jade Emperor myth are Yu Huang and the demon, the high Gods also make a small appearance.

Yu Huang (The Jade Emperor)
Yu Huang is the main character of the myth, which is centered around his life. Throughout the tale he grows and develops.  At the beginning he is just a baby without any purpose, but as he ages, Yu realizes the importance of following the Tao.  He becomes an inherently good person and begins a life of servitude.  After he also spends an eternity in a cliff meditating, Yu Huang develops a stupendous intelligence and powers.  As for his physical features he has long black hair and a mustache.





The Demon
In the myth the demon is a super powerful being that defeated the gods.  It is quite apparent that the monster must be incredibly strong and skilled.  While there isn't any direct evidence for the demon's physical appearance, it might be something like this.



The Gods
At the end of the myth all of the gods proclaimed that the Yu Huang should become the ruler of all deities. The most important of the gods was the Three Pure Ones.  They are the divine trinity of the Taoist religion.  Their titles are Jade Pure, Upper Pure, and Great Pure.  They are believed to be manifestations of the legendary Lao Tzu.

Setting of the Jade Emperor

While the tale of the Jade Emperor is purely fictional, many of its details correlate to real life characteristics.  Many of these examples pertain to physical locations that occur both in the myth and in reality.  In fact, this story, which was compiled during the Tang Dynasty, has details based on the nearby landmarks.  One of these includes the birthplace of Yu Huang.  As the legend has it, the future Jade Emperor was born in a kingdom of China.  Based on the time of the myths origin, one can hypothesize that Yu's hometown would be similar to a kingdom from the Tang Dynasty.  The modern day Tang Dynasty Village in Singapore is a theme park that shows what the village of Chang'An would have looked like in the Tang Dynasty.  The Jade Emperor would have grown up in a town such as this.

Using details from the story, the more information on the physical setting of the myth can be determined.  To find out the geographical location of the myth, one can examine the time when Yu Huang went to meditate on a cliff.  The fabled Bright and Fragrant Cliffs might not exist, but it was based off of nearby landmarks, such as Mt. Hua.

 Thus, it can be concluded that the setting of the tale must be near cliffs and inside the Tang Boundary.  This leads to the conclusion that the Jade Emperor myth took place in a village near the Loess Plateau during the Tang Dynasty.